Motorbike RTW: January 2018

“You’re never ready until you’re ready and then you’re still not ready”. Our heads are buzzing with this mantra as we try and get ready. The lists of ‘things to do’ seem to be endless and as we cross things off the top, more appear on the bottom. We’ve been preparing for this day for at least 11 years, and as my son says “he’s been hearing about it for 11 years”!

Normally our winter break is enjoyed riding our 200cc around Thailand, but this year we had gone to Thailand early, in October for our 3 month stint, expecting to return only in December to spend time with our family. Our fabulous trusty Tiger2 was in storage in Phuket, costing a small amount, not too much but enough

to warrant it being moved to our family up north. We planned a roundtrip from Thailand, across east through Cambodia, then up north to Laos and back to the northeast in Isan country, where our extended family live. A family illness at home changed our plans and our trip in Thailand lasted 15 days. It was enough time to collect the bike, ride 4000kms north, build a sturdy 2x3m breezeblock garage on the side of the kitchen at Bamboozer INN, Ban Thon, Khon Kaen and fly back to France. Knowing that the bike is safe and secure for a good few years until we return was the start of getting the stars aligned.

The empty days between Xmas and New Year, when festivities are over, the holiday break is coming to an end, the French weather outside is foul and the question of what shall we do? and

where shall we go? loomed. The tragedy that brought us home is prolonged and ongoing and we are powerless to help. In a mood of despair, we grasp on the long suppressed idea that now is the time to start our RTW. Retirement finances are just sufficient. Our sale of extraneous bric-a-brac has boosted the RTW fund. Family commitments are stable. Our health is good, at 64 years and 79 years. Our lock-up-and-go is ready to be locked-up-and-go’ed. We bought the much needed waterproof panniers and liners on our recent trip to Thailand. The bike has been modified to almost perfection. We have a family friend of more than 30 years willing to housesit for 9 months. More and more stars are aligning themselves.

What more is there to do?

Just GO.

The two weeks between the idea of going (29 ^th January 2018) are filled with tiny details. We do lots of internet searches and purchases and hours of u-tube viewing of other Motorcycle Adventure Travels in South America, tips and hints of what to do, where to go and how to get there.

December 2017) and the action of departing (12

Cost Star: Emails are sent around the globe to shipping companies and agents. We chose James Cargo Services Limited to fly our bike to Buenos Aires and Dakarmotos to help us through customs the other end. Medical and travel insurance becomes quite an ordeal as we trawl through the internet looking at options. Being on the wrong side of 75 years, on a motorcycle and going for more than 3 months, we are considered

a high risk. The costs are beyond our budget until our French Insurance man finds us the right product, at the right price, worldwide for one year, with the provision we return to France every 3months to ‘check-in’. That’s fine by us. James Cargo have assured us they have agents willing to store our bike while we do the return trip in between rides. Documents are scanned and sent to all parties concerned. The hotel in Buenos Aires is booked and paid for on our arrival night. We’ve set up direct debits and done a budget, reckoning about 60-90 euros per day maximum for food, fuel and accommodation. We meet up with our lovely English-speaking French

Bank manager and tell her that the card will be showing up lots of purchases from far way places. She is so excited for us and it is beginning to dawn that the moment we have been rehearsing for is nearly upon us. The stage is almost set for opening night.

Sometimes we feel as if there are plots to stop us

· the printer cartridges need replacing

· the internet goes off for maintenance

· the shops are closed for inventory

· the stock is not available

· the nurse needs a prescription for the vaccinations

· the doctor is on holiday

we need a week between vaccinations and the time to depart France is a few days away.

Medical Star: Vaccination requirements for South America include Meningitis, Typhoid, Diphtheria/Polio/Whooping cough, Yellow Fever with Certificate, Tetanus, Hep B & A, and Cholera. We check our Health Record Card to find there is a mish-mash of what we have and don’t have/need. We get the prescriptions from the doctor for some and the lovely nurse comes to the house and jabs us. I make an appointment with City Docs in the UK near the Airport for the missing ones in a week’s time. B gets a 6 month supply of his tablets. A kit bag with medical essentials is packed.

Bike Star: the Sertao gets stripped and serviced. We remove the back wheel, chain and sprocket. B thoroughly inspects the sprocket and turns it around before replacing it. The Michelin tyre still appears impressively new even though we bought it in Greece and it has done another 12000kms. We buy and fit a matching front tyre. He drains the radiator and spots flecks of oil in the water. The hunt is now on for a set of waterpump seals (on a Sunday, in rural France) - no chance. By Tuesday night they have been ordered, delivered and fitted. The front sprocket is badly worn on the splines. We raid the X-country and swop the front sprockets. The bike also has the front-end from the X-country, so it’s

now a bit of a hybrid and is ready to GO. Our clever friend, who builds bikes, skilfully fits a stainless steel tool box between the engine and the front wheel and two platform-type extensions to the Alu panniers. The bike gets new oil and a new oil and air filter. The new battery is checked, no water needed. The Scott Oiler is primed and checked against the re-fitted chain. The headlights now sport an LED bulb and the spotlights we bought in Thailand are fitted. We fit extra brackets to the front box that projects over the front wheel (carrying spare parts) and remount the GPS bracket. B has fitted a ‘manual’ cruise control, which we tested and enjoyed on our trip to Jersey/Norfolk and back.

Gear Star: My heated vest gets a make-over. We sort out good thermals from rubbish ones. In the

UK, where we have a week between delivering the bike and waiting for our plane, we buy a new visor, keeping the slightly scratched one as a spare. We waterproof our gaiters/spats with a double dose of spray and our dear friend in the UK gives our boots a good polish.

Security Star: Amazon and EBay must love us as we order a personal alarm, a disc brake alarm and a Targos Defcon cable alarm. We carry a hefty chain looped around the tank bag. We buy an ultralight weight bike cover and chunky bike lock. In the UK we research the SPOT TRACKER, which is duly purchased and connected. Various trips into the garden at 2⁰ reveal it can catch the GPS signal and send Spot tracking signals to the Page on the computer/smartphone. We set up family and friends as virtual watchdogs.

Camping Star: Berghaus gets an order for their ultralight 3 man-tent with vestibule. We weigh all our bedding and camping kit, knowing we must lose at least a few kilograms. The bedding bag weighs 9kg, we get it down to 7kg by losing pillows and those tiny aeroplane blankets courtesy of China

Air. The camping kit weighs too much. We get rid of one chair, take off the BBQ grill, replace the traditional groundsheet with an ultralight one from Geertop, and the new tent is already 2 kgs lighter than the old one. We manage to shave a total of 5kgs off the camping and bedding weight from the Eastern European trip. We halve the amount of the clothes we pack, which removes another few kgs. In the UK we buy reflective adhesive tape to wrap around the black waterproof bags. We also hope to lose some personal kgs !!

Document Star: CHECK LIST: International Driving License, Passports, Bike Registration (Carte Gris) and Proof of Purchase, Health Cards, Travel Insurance paper, Air Ticket, Notebooks for Journal and Codes.

Electronic Star: CHECK LIST: Smartphone, Lapbook, Camera, GoPro, and now Spot are all ready to GO. The Helmet intercom is checked and charged, with charging cables reduced to the minimum. The Garmin is updated and a map of South America purchased and

installed. Cigarette type charger.

Spares and Tools Star: CHECKLIST: Batteries for Spot and lamps. Spare microSD’s. Spectacles. Tyre lever. Tyre pump. Tyre pressure gauge. Jumper leads. Spanners. Scott oil. Duct tape. Syphon tube. Gasket cement. Bulbs. Puncture repair kit. Chain link master. Visor. Oil filter. A 17” inner tube that will work for the 17” back tyre and stretch for the 19” front one. Bolts, nuts, washes. Fuses.

Route Star: We land at Buenos Aires and aim South, and at some time aim North, with a zig-zag in the middle. That’s it. We land on the same day as the DAKAR RACE ends.

At last the list of checks and to do’s gets shorter. We say farewell to our fabulously supportive friends and on a sunny but chilly 6⁰ mid-morning, we ride out of the drive for the 500kms ride to the ferry at Dieppe. By 16h30 the

temperature has dropped to 4⁰ and the nearer ferry port of Caen is calling. We buy an overnight ticket, hang around for a few hours in the cosy café and eventually board just before midnight. Their carpets are really soft and our good sleep was aided by a whisky-tasting promotion on board. A few phone calls to re-arrange our schedule brought us together with another wing of the family that we haven’t met up with for at least 6 years. The warm welcome, not to mention the delicious breakfast and supper, made us feel very special and cared for. Then from Bournemouth it was a short whippy ride in 5⁰ to Amersham where we have been spoilt from top to toe, while we gather our thoughts, have more injections, deliver the bike to James Cargo and complete the endless list.

B leaves ahead of me to test-track the SPOT in London. It works. I catch up a few days later and

we train down to friends (the same ones who joined us in Croatia) near Gatwick. We have a very merry evening, followed by a very early start, last minute bits and pieces and then we get delivered to South Terminal. Not much to do now! Somehow all the stars are aligned and it’s time to go.

To Norfolk, via Jersey

Our Eastern European tour was a great success. We tested the bike and ourselves for 2months and 15,000kms and are pleasantly surprised at the outcome. We can pitch a tent for 57 days. We can survive in rain and cold and heat. We can eat cold spaghetti out of a glass jar and we still love each other.

However, there are a few modifications to be made on the bike: the most pressing one being to install a Scott Oiler. B is meticulous about regularly oiling the chain at 100 kms intervals. When the bike is unloaded it’s an effort. When the bike is loaded it’s a BIG effort. “One, two three, heave” we call as we synchronise feet placements, arm movements and shoulder pushing. For our RTW (Round The World) trip, which is looming, this is not something we want to do. After a bit of research on the internet, a Scott Oiler is purchased, delivered and fitted. We plan to try this on our next adventure to Norfolk, via the Battle Flower Show in Jersey. We had struggled a bit on the steep uphill curves when tackling the mountain passes in Romania and Central Italy, so B put his action plan to swop

front-ends of the X-Country and Sertao into place. To boost our finances we participated in the annual Bric-a-Brac that takes place in the rural French village where we live. The proceeds go into the RTW fund. It’s now the middle of August and we have a chance to test the modifications.

The 410kms ride on the highway to St.Malo was cold, wet and windy but ended in glorious sunshine at the ferry port. Whilst waiting for the ferry we dozed off in the warmth of the afternoon sun. We have pre-booked a campsite on the East side of Jersey island as the population swells during this grand event. It is held on the 2^nd Thursday of August, having started in 1902 to celebrate the coronation of King Edward VII and Queen Alexandra. The storms that challenged us on the French mainland riding to the ferry port continued during our stay in Jersey. Wearing full rain gear we circumnavigated one side of the island, spotting the WW2 bunkers and lighthouses and getting our bearings for parking the bike during the show. We ventured into cosy harbour cafes to

sample traditional Jersey Ice Cream, Potatoes and Black Butter (Spicy Apple Preserve). The day of the Flower Show arrives and still in our hi-vis full suit rain gear we stand in the queue. We are approached by a rather frantic Marshall who mistakes us for part of the missing skydiving team. We assure him that motorbikes are our thing, not jumping out of planes. Coincidentally, he is also South African and takes the joke one step further by introducing us to fellow Marshalls as part of the sky diving team, who have now been found. The language of Jersey is a Jersey-Norman dialect with an unusual accent that has a strangely familiar

South African twang. We checked with our new friend that he is indeed from SA and not a Jersey man.

The show was brilliant, full of colour, fun and noise. The marching bands led the flower-decked floats up and down the parade road for at least 2 hours. The sun came out for the show and the wind blew the storm clouds away. The three nights under tent had seen the tarp blow away and tear a bit, the challenge of a different tiny 2 man tent suffocating and cramped and the need for 100% waterproof panniers paramount. We are now narrowing down the specifications for our RTW.

· B needs a chair with a back, not a Tripod chair

· 3-man tent, imperative with vestibule

· Waterproof front panniers

· Waterproof liners for back sling overs

· A bigger platform over the back to double up as a table, with holes for cups

· More efficient lighting fuel for the petrol stove

· Repair my heated vest

· B needs bigger gloves

· Collapsible pots, kettle and plates

· Windshield for stove

· Lighter weight ground sheets.

After three days where we encountered all weathers, bar the snow, we continue the journey and catch the ferry to Poole. The bad weather continues, which is rather disappointing for mid-summer, so when we land at 19h30 we question whether we will make the 200kms journey to our friends near Gatwick before the storm breaks.

Well the decision is made for us. We stop at a café to top-up our UK sim card and I switch the Garmin Navigator on to add addresses and compare distances and routes. It drains the battery: the same battery that caused us so much trouble in Belgrade. We are now stuck in Poole late on a Friday night with a loaded motorbike and no power. “Push”, says B as he foots it down the level road and I do my best. Surprise,

surprise, we are at sea level and there are no hills. We get further and further away from the café and then spot a slightly uphill driveway. No-body is at home and some very kind unknowing people have lent us their driveway. We push the bike up and with an almighty push back down the driveway, it starts. The relief is huge. A decision is made to re-route ourselves to family in Worcester, where we will tout the bike shops on Saturday morning and invest in a brand new battery. We set off in the dark, and complete the 250kms, arriving just past midnight to a warm, if not surprised welcome.

Battery purchased and fitted and after a few days

catching up with our South African family, we set off again to do the 320kms cross country ride from Worcester to Norwich. This is another mega South African reunion with a week of partying and some shopping. We can tick chair, pots, plates and gloves off the ‘to buy’ list. We catch up with a fellow biker at a bike-show-in-a-field-pub. The homeward route takes us 300kms south to our friends near Gatwick, another ferry and home to our lovely rural French village home. The ferry arrives in Dieppe at 5am, again cold and very wet. What happened to the sun this summer? We know it is 540 kms to home, but having only semi-dozed on the carpeted floor overnight, by 8am we are getting tired and hungry. A quick boil-up of coffee at a laybye restored us for a few hours, but when we spotted a patch of grass bathed in sunshine next to a

parking zone in the cropped wheat fields, we could not resist a zizz. Parking the bike on its centre stand, we hopped over the Armco barriers and flopped onto the grass, hitting the sack immediately, keeping our helmets on, which are perfect pillows.. About an hour later, we heard a very concerned voice “bonjour, bonjour” calling us. As soon as we responded with “ merci, je suis fatigue, je suis d’accord “, our rescuer nodded and departed. Such a kind act, the poor car owner had probably thought we’d been flung over the edge. Suitably refreshed the remaining few hours ride to home was pleasant enough, where we put the bike in doors, closed the shutters and went back to bed.